Wednesday, November 5, 2014

new site, new blog... please join me!

as long promised...
a shiny new look
a fresh new space!

please, join me...

this space will no longer be updated. please change your subscriptions and feedly readers to

Friday, September 5, 2014

for henry...

 photo HBD23_zpsb64379c8.jpg

we gathered again

on the 10th of august

for an evening at our happy place-

 photo HBD24_zpsa549bc04.jpg

the beach.

 photo HBD22_zpsdcc94ce2.jpg

 photo HBD21_zps4d393674.jpg

 photo HBD20_zps7ab30044.jpg

with our people.

 photo HBD25_zps9f36647d.jpg

dinner and wine (with the most perfect name).

 photo HBD18_zps23297d30.jpg

decorated with love, for the boy we celebrated.

wishes and prayers
we wrote
and sent-

 photo HBD26_zps2931e8c8.jpg

 photo HBD19_zpsffae644b.jpg

 photo HBD15_zps1dcc96a3.jpg

happy birthday 
we sang

 photo HBD17_zpsda24a7ae.jpg

 photo HBD16_zps9c4d4e0f.jpg

up to heaven
for our boy

 photo HBD6_zps25a77b7b.jpg

 photo HBD10_zpscba7ab56.jpg

 photo HBD13_zpsfb8e2db2.jpg

 photo HBD8_zps35b0adda.jpg

 photo HBD4_zpse455abd5.jpg

 photo HBD7_zpscb3c0290.jpg

henry patrick waldo jagger

 photo HBD12_zps50bf26b1.jpg

 photo HBD1_zpsbb4673cb.jpg

 photo HBD2_zpsf11871c1.jpg

and kisses
and tears
love and gratitude

two. xo

(last year)

Monday, September 1, 2014

august, fully loaded...

 photo swimming2_zps459b4554.jpg

just when we get
deep into the delicious ease of july-
that sandy, joyful, barefoot, afternoon-napping bit of summer...

 photo swimming_zps62e06dbb.jpg

august arrives-

 photo emptybeach_zps2f199576.jpg

august is...


and fast... too fast...

heavy rememberances
dreaded goodbyes
twisted and mixed up with
joyful celebrations

 photo summerems3_zps03379281.jpg

 photo summerems_zps5408afe0.jpg

 wham! bam!
and it's over-
like a tornado
through your soul
and then...
there your are.
and standing, yes... standing...

but alone

on an empty beach

everyone gone
but so not forgotten...
and every year it just feels harder-
this deep-in-your-bones emptiness

 photo beachstorm_zpsa8ce58f5.jpg

and here we are
but so.very. homesick.
for our tribe.
and those summer days
we wait all year for...

 photo summertexture_zps6692ae9b.jpg

 photo summerbeach_zpsd0b30d6a.jpg

all of a sudden, we are here...
sitting on the edge of fall
not ready for the jump-

but before we can even take one last breath
school and meetings and a calendar full of appointments
are pushing us in.

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

here. back, again...

i guess that's what i went ahead and did-
it's been nearly 10 months since i've checked in here
and i'm not sure if there is anyone still out there
but i do hope so
and i thank you. thank you, for coming back

 photo flight_zps6d919d51.jpg

the time away has been good to me
so, so very good to me
and i've found myself craving a return-
there is so much to share

(and a new look, coming soon
which feels so right and so good)

but for now, i'm ready
for the long over-due
dive back in

Wednesday, September 4, 2013


 photo nursingweb_zps2ceb5778.jpg
nursing this babe
in a jumble of pillows
our bare skin
in the milky early morning sun
a coolness of fall, nearly begun
and raindrops 
whispering good morning
while lulling us
back to sleep


these moments.
of motherhood
motherhood !
they are thick with joy
but they are going. too. fast.
i'm feeling desperate
to pause.
and float around in each second.

i've always been
running ahead
always waiting and wanting for the next day, year, milestone...
my mum used to warn me not to "wish my life away"-
at three i was begging for kindergarten and soon after, for so long, all i wanted was to turn 30 (!)
to get married, to own a home, for babies...

but now
here i am-
a baby
our baby
deep asleep on my chest
life feels 
just. right.

it feels
like what i've been waiting 
my whole life for...

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

celebrating henry

throughout this past pregnancy
i kept peaking ahead
to this month-


with a scramble of emotions-
love, fear, anxiety, pain, excitement

 photo henrybdaycakelit_zpsfe82abc0.jpg

the due date of our daughter
the anniversary of losing henry

i needed to find a way
to remember our sweet son
and the excitement i felt
on the day he was born-

the day i became a mom

in a way
that wasn't totally 

i needed a celebration.

to find a way to honor 
what a joy he was
in our lives


if it was only for just 
11 days

something to share 
with our family
who felt the loss of henry
almost as completely as we did

a new tradition
that our future children
would love 

we planned a birthday beach night-
our favorite kind of easy summer celebration

 photo henrybdaycircle_zps223a5e38.jpg
a sand-side picnic

 photo henrybdayem_zps5dba857d.jpg
our favorite people

 photo henrybadycakedetail_zpsbb0bd75b.jpg
mama-decorated birthday cake

 photo henrybdaytaps_zps70e55485.jpg
taps at sunset

and then
after the sun had gone down

we sent paper lanterns
 photo henrybday2_zpscb60d194.jpg
into the night sky

 photo henrybday1_zps07a9ecea.jpg
decorated with our 
wishes + prayers

for henry patrick

on his first birthday
 photo henrybdaycake_zps8c7fcfd3.jpg
and it was

a celebration

 photo henrybdaycakeout_zps6d555bf9.jpg
with love and thanks

Sunday, August 18, 2013


 photo 1a36806d-0728-4cbf-a52c-b589aa2d8150_zps963358ac.jpg
emily waldo jagger
arrived thursday
august 8th
at 9:40am

oh, oh...
there is so very much to share

and i will

but i'm completely distracted
by her milky, deep-sleep sighs 
on my chest

 photo e91be3e9-4672-4236-8d77-8d7f6e8d097b_zpsfa363c13.jpg

it's been almost exactly a month
since i've posted
and it's been a bursting one for sure-
a roller coaster 
of summer goodness
paralyzing anxiety
and love

love. love. love.

with each 
deep, deep breath 
that i take
weighted only by 6lbs 12oz
of slumbering sweetness
i can feel 
my heart
being stitched 
from the bottom 

 photo 2dc76a54-42f9-4b50-b080-c8b79d33587b_zpsbfeabe50.jpg

sweet birdie

photos: orchardcove